Letting Go of Attachment
On my spiritual journey I have struggled with detaching myself from my desires. I get so pumped up about a goal when my desire brings it forth and then want nothing more than for it to manifest. But then I often come crashing down in despair and frustration that what I want is not here yet. I know I'm supposed to be patient and trust the process. But can't it pick up its pace a little bit?
I also let my ego take over my consciousness and feed into my insecurities when I focus on what its supposed to look like. Most of my writers block comes from the fact my ego thinks I'm crazy to compete with so many other great writers who are writing the same thing. My attachment to the outcome has given my negative side some ammunition to its argument, therefore I stay in my place of stuck.
This is when I get to my meditation bench and have my higher self figure this out. I find my best conversations are within, and with patience, I always find an answer. On one particular defeated day, I sat in my quite space and let my body direct the conversation. I used the technique called "Focusing" which was coined my psychologist and author, Eugene Gedlin.
What you are directed to do is to name the sensation in your body that is screaming at you the most. When you name it, you get your answer when that sensation goes away. It's a powerful tool, and I highly recommend it.
The sensation in my body was a heaviness that felt like it was pulling my lower back away from me. I also sensed that there were two spot on my lower back that felt connected to something. When I said the words in my mind, "detach," the feeling lessened. Then I silently said, "I needed to detach from the outcome," and boom, the feeling disappeared.
I knew this meant that I was to not have any care in the world about the outcomes of what I was doing. It didn't matter if my book that I was writing would be a New York Times best seller. In fact, it didn't even matter if anyone read it at all. I realized it was the joy of writing it that motivated me to do it in the first place. And when I let go of what was going to happen, the writers block that I had been battling with lifted.
I also learned to not have attachments to what relationships looked like to me. My role in these relationships was to just enjoy them. No expectations, and no worry about how it was all going to end. I stopped worrying about my classes I taught and wondering how I should grow it into something bigger. Instead I find such joy with teaching, the outcome of where it was going to go meant nothing to me anymore.
So you see, when you let go of attachments, you can focus on the moment and use life as the beautiful canvas it was meant to be. Does this mean you shouldn't have goals and dreams? Not unless these desires are helping you paint your life one color at a time. See each and everyday as a special spot on your drawing. Enjoy what is being brought forth. But don't try to sell your work before it is complete. No one wants to buy a blank canvas.