The Meaning Of Your LIfe
Sometimes I imagine what my life would be like if it were a movie. A beginning, a climax and then the end... all wrapped up in a pretty bow with laughter, love, and of course a happy ending.
I remember at the beginning of my separation with my ex-husband, sitting in the basement of my friends house, who was nice enough to take me and my kids in, watching Cinderella. I silently cried at the loss of my fairy tale. I didn't want to worry my kids with the enormity of my emotions during this time. So I kept it strong and kept my head high. At times, that too seemed like an impossibility.
I think its at these very deep depths of our beings that we begin to search for meaning. The superficial doesn't seem to cut it after you have been through a traumatic event. I grew up knowing that life can be hard, but to be forever thankful for those life changing events. These events give your life meaning and its difficult times like my divorce that I had to search deep and find the meaning of my life.
Now, unlike movies, I've begun to realize that there is no beginning, middle or end. Life is a continuous process filled with hills and valley's. The goal really is to pay attention and capture those moments that have meaning. I equate my kids to the purest meaning possible.
Its funny how many of my friends feel sorry for me for being a single parent. Little do they know how much meaning and depth my kids give me. I would be lost without them. I often feel bad that they aren't growing up with a two parent household. My boys still remember the day we moved out, tears and all. But I love them completely. They know that, and its their love that gets me through the rough days and nights that I go through.
I have also found meaning in my career as a nurse. My patients forever give me meaning to my life. There is nothing more raw then having your body stripped away from normalcy and then replaced with tubes, hospital gowns and diapers (yes, a lot of my patients have issues there). But their heart is out there. I'll never forget a patient who found out he was dying that very day from the doctors with some sort of cancer. I held his hand while he cried and reminisced about his mom's cooking. How as a child he loved watching her cook. The pure beauty and love of that moment took my breath away. I'm so blessed to be a nurse.
The meaning of life should not be about anyone but you. I have found my meaning in people, in my kids and in my connection with spirit. I often meet people who don't know the meaning of their lives. I recommend to just stop and look around, and I guarantee you'll find meaning. A meaning very special to you. It just takes some courage to really see what is around you and to be awake for all that life has to offer you.